12-31-23
Technically, this is a 2023 blog. But whatever. I will put it for 2024 for ease of access since my old stuff is all on my old website.
Anyways... new blog finally! I was gonna write this for tumblr but I got off my ass so i could have this web page ready ffs. I have been very absent in the past months...i haven't written a blog at all on my pages since May 2023 it seems, so it has been a fuckin while. I wont go through all the details but i wanna give a run down of this year because oh, man... has it been a lot. A lot of good, imo.
Coming out of last year, I had rediscovered some old interests and made some new friends, I feel like I finally have some kinda online circle of friends after so long of not having it since all the changes of the internet. However my goal has always been to really try and get myself to doing shit IRL too. I have IRL friends, but after no college, and now those people moving further away, I could seriously tell that my life was lacking real life stimulation-- added with living alone, doesn't help. Everything kinda came together after I saw a neuro psych for many many weeks in the summer. It was a ton of work but it has also brought me more knowledge on a variety of issues I have had in terms of cognitive ability and other mental issues. When I completed those sessions its like I got slam dunked into a whole new phase of my life.
My friends had just finished moving and while they were further away, they still came out towards me for a number of things and I managed to get myself into some of the weekly things they were doing- even picking up new stuff like playing Yu Gi Oh, and actually getting into their DnD group (i havent played since 2018 and I have been missing it so bad!!). In between that though, I was going to numerous concerts, still had my normal therapy, had two week long instances of being with friends nonstop, and surgery. And god, how can I forget, I don't think I even mentioned it here-- I made a video game for a game jam, with it being my first ever game I made... While super short, all those issues I was figuring out during the summer tie into my struggles to have even made that, so it was a big acheivement to have managed that in the course of a month long jam. Additionally its worth linking 2023 Art Summary too!
This isn't everything for sure, and I have had some negative stuff pop up in my life this year too, but the number of positives, especially long term positives, have made this a very big year with lots of progress. Technically, I feel overwhelmed in a way especially when I look at what I would like to try and do this year. Acquiring knowledge on my cognitive issues will provide me with new and better ways to go about lots of things I have wanted to try and do-- namely school and learning. But its not "i know the issue, not I can do it". Its "I know whats wrong and I can try these things as solutions". Which is what makes it so exhausting and anxiety inducing- will it work? will this accomodation help? will none of it work? This is The question of 2024 for me. I can't answer it right now, nor will I try or vent through the rest of this blog. But, its gonna be 2024 and I'll have to find out. This last year definitely went off in ways I never expected and it was good, so I hope it'll end up like that again.